Couldn't Sleep... Surprise!

I attribute my being awake to two things. First, I have been hydrating like crazy (do I need to fully explain that thought?) Second, I didn't take any Ambien tonight. I can now honestly say that without drugs to over-ride it, my back pain keeps me awake at night. My discomfort has notably increased these past few months, but I've had drugs to keep me functioning most of the time.

I so look forward to sleeping better in a few weeks time :)

Anywho, as I was laying here, I thought it would be nice to post something that gives a visual for what I'm having done tomorrow. DON'T PANIC. There are no blood or guts in this animation. It just shows how the hardware will be used. However, you should be warned that the videos surrounding it have cover images of some actual surgeries, which do have the real thing. So, be careful not to click on any of those if you're squeamish.

If you want to check it out, here's the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WBIf4AQj5s0

In addition, this gal has a wonderfully detailed blog about her successful fusion surgery.. (Please be warned, she's very candid, and not all of it is child friendly content.) She also put up some images from her Flickr account that are great. Before/After pics and x-rays, etc.

Blog:
http://www.scoligirl.com/

Flickr:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/7512920@N06/sets/72157600026049822/

To note: I just realized she had the exact same levels/number of vertebrae fused that I am having fused. Jazzy! She grew two inches. BUT my curves are 70 over 70 degrees, hers were 60 over 48. Translation, I am way more wacka-doo, and therefore might gain more height than that? :)

If you aren't one of the 60 people who has viewed this blog in the last 10 hours, be sure to check out my post previous to this one. It has details on my surgery time, hospital stay, contacting/visiting me, etc.

Off to try this 'sleeping thing' again!

Surgery Tomorrow

Hello family and friends!

Writing the title for this post was surprisingly easy. I feel good about the surgery. You can't say that you're truly 'ready' for something like this, but the Lord has given me an incredible peace this week.

I get to wake up at 4am tomorrow and shower with special super-strength germ killing soap. We are to be checking in at Swedish at 5:40am, and surgery is scheduled to start at 7:40am. Thank God I don't have to wait through the day. There would be far too much time for thinking, if that were the case! As is, I should be out of the operating room and into recovery around noon, definitely before 1 o'clock.

Backtracking a bit.
I had my blood banked over the past few weeks. Two separate visits to the center, two units drawn. That was a very easy process. A gal named Debbie worked with me both times, and she was a pro! To note, my mom went with me the first time, and Bethany drove me the second, which was wonderful. Illustration for you:

That's Debbie on the right. I can hardly say how much I appreciated her!

Tuesday my parents went with me to Swedish for pre-op appointments. X-rays, meeting with the surgeon and nurses, then a full physical. The x-rays looked good. Er, that is to say, as they were expected to look! haha. No significant changes in my curves since the ones taken in January. We got all of our questions answered by Dr. Hanscom and the nurses we chatted with. They provided lots of detail on what to expect pre and post-op. My physical went fine, I am certified disease free and ready for surgery!

My finals wrapped up well and we moved my stuff back to my parent's house. I've spent the past week visiting with friends and family. I have been so incredibly blessed by the support of everyone around me. It seems as though I've had more texts and FB posts this past week than in the last year of my life. Haha.

This picture sums up how I've been feeling surrounded by love... Some of my Bible study ladies; Hailey, who is going to be at the hospital tomorrow, is in the black apron. Jessica is red polka-dots, and Anna is sunflowers. I love them!

After I finish this post, I'll be emailing the link to people. Jacob has received his Blogspot tutorial and is ready to update y'all as needed. Thank you for your prayers and for following along!

Later this afternoon, I'm going to pack up everything I'm taking to the hospital. It strikes me that the things I'm bringing are pretty entertaining (that is to say, they're mostly for entertainment purposes. Oooh, PUN!)
Top of the list, my Winnie the Pooh coloring book, and brand new 48 pack of Crayola crayons. (I know, you're jealous.) After this are my Kindle, iPod, Bible, journal, robe, and some clothes to travel home in.

My cell phone is coming with, but I'll have it off. It's more there for the contact info it contains.

Speaking of contact; I would love to have visitors, but most likely not for the first 2 weeks. If you would like to come see me later in June, just text, FB, email, or call someone in my family, or myself, and we'll get back to you about when would be a good time. We will be posting here about how I'm feeling and when I'll be up to seeing people.

My verse of the week: Psalm 139:13-16

"For You created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful. I know this full well.
My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, Your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

I also thought I would note the top 5 songs on my playlist this week. Each of these represent an emotion I've been through, or a prayer that I've prayed these past few weeks.

Bring the Rain - MercyMe
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8HgAVenbUU

Your Love is Strong - Jon Foreman
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=301S7NgAkLs

All of My Days - Alexi Murdoch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIQLha4zcQI

Beauty From Pain - Superchick
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqBMYoctFZM

He Is With You - Mandisa
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P3CVlv2dz3w

Again, thank you all so much for your prayers and support... I'll see you on the other side :)

Surgery Date Set

I can hardly believe I've let so much time pass since my last post. A lot has happened since February.

In the interest of keeping this blog focused on things pertaining to surgery, I will put details on that first. My surgery has been set for Friday, June 3rd. There was some switcheroo and a day of confusion, which resulted in surgery being bumped up from the 6th to the 3rd. My pre-op appointments at Swedish will be on Tuesday, April 31st.

Pre-op appointments start with having updated x-rays taken. Following this, I will meet with my surgeon to discuss the particulars of my surgery. Then I go for a full physical and blood-work, to be sure I am fully fit and healthy.

In addition to this, I will be going twice to have my blood "banked" in the four weeks leading up to surgery. This process, technically called autologous blood donation, will make my own blood available, if I should need a transfusion. A surgery like this does involve a lot of blood loss, but in a controlled hospital setting, a transfusion is not always necessary.

  As of now, I am fairly at peace about the date being set. God has shown me, already, that He is going to provide everything I need to get through the surgery and recovery.

  I recently found out that I will be done with all of my finals on Tuesday, May 24th. This affords me a few more days of summer, since my last final could have been on Friday the 27th. Because of this, I will have a full week to simply enjoy summer and get my "ducks in a row" before I have to go through pre-op appointments. I am overjoyed at this fact!

  Many new friends have been brought into my life, and pre-existing friendships have been strengthened, recently. I know these people were sent to help walk me through this journey. A few young women have been placed in my life who have dealt with serious health issues and surgeries, and they have shared the things they learned from their experiences. I have been blessed with wonderful listeners, a few in particular that have spoken the Lord's truth into my life and helped to get me through some pretty rough days as of late. Others have been there to simply listen, providing acceptance and loving me right where I'm at. My gratefulness to the Lord for sending these people to surround me is beyond words.

A huge blessing has been the friendship of my housemate, and dear friend, Hailey. She is an awesome young woman who has a heart and passion for the Lord that I greatly admire; she feels called to go into the missions field when she has completed her nursing degree, to work in medical missions.

Hailey had plans to go to Spain this summer to study medical Spanish. Unexpectedly, the door was shut on this opportunity for her. Rather than moping, she quickly determined that she should use the money intended for her trip to live at our house near school this summer. She intends to take part in an internship through our campus ministry group, and has offered some of her time to take care of me, which will give my mother some much needed "me" time during my recovery.

Most of all, I am thankful for Hailey's offer to be at the hospital, with my family, on the day of my surgery. I have no doubt that the way God made her, (as both an incredibly calming presence and a prayer warrior,) will be a comfort to my family. She and my brother Jake will be sharing in updating my blog during the time that I am in the hospital and during my early recovery.

A last note; my parents and I went to Arizona over spring break and had an absolute blast! It was wonderful to get some sunshine, go on some red rock hikes, and have uninterrupted time together. A few of my favorite pictures from the trip are below :) I will post again soon!

My February musings...

So, with February quickly drawing to a close, I am faced with the reality that we are well into 2011. Spring semester has started in school, the weather ought to be getting warmer soon, (though it is currently blizzarding outside my window,) and time is really flying by.

I want to start out by sharing some pretty snazzy stuff I got to do in the past few weeks, since my last appointment and post. All of these things have been important to me, because they are either things that I have avoided, or had difficulty, doing because of my back. They are also things that I want to keep doing well into the future, and as such, are part of my motivation for having surgery. As I have been getting into the gym, I've been feeling a zillion times better already, and I've kind of surprised myself with what I've been able to handle. It's quite exciting :D

    

Hiking Little Si, North Bend, WA

Playing in my first competitive soccer game in 7 YEARS! Hecks YES!!!

The following are pics from a camping trip I did with friends this past weekend, to Cape Disappointment, Wa, down on the Long Beach Peninsula. Please note the gorgeous views, nifty people, and my sense of humor with driftwood :)

   

   

My mom and I attended another appointment with Dr. Hanscom last Thursday, the 17th. It was mostly to review what we had gone over at the appointment in late January, and to see how I have been doing with some of the suggestions he gave me. I think Dr. Hanscom almost cried from joy, due to my quick compliance to treatment. He said he's never seen someone take to it faster than me. This kind of amazed me, because all I did was just DO what my doctor suggested. It seems simple enough.

First of all, I have been getting into the gym at least 3 days a week, and I've been getting outside and getting active on the weekends, hiking, playing some soccer, etc. This alone has made such a huge difference, in both my physical health and my mental/emotional state. Physically, I am feeling much better than I did in the fall. Overall, I am more fit, and my core strength has improved already, which has almost eliminated much of the back fatigue and soreness I had been experiencing as of late. Just knowing that I've been able to make a plan for working out, and then sticking with that schedule, has given me a much more positive attitude, as well. Not to mention, I really enjoy getting in the gym and swimming- who'da thunk it?

Secondly, I got on sleep aids. I'm taking a low does of Ambien each evening. It operates to help you fall asleep, and stay asleep for 5 to 6 hours. As Dr. Hanscom says, "No sleep is not an option." Let me tell you what; I was hardly sleeping before these drugs. Now, at least the time I am spending in bed is paying off. That's not to say that I shouldn't be spending more time in bed, but being a busy college student tends to cut into your sleep schedule. That's something I still need to work on.

Last, I have started (begrudgingly) to engage in some writing exercises and reading the book "Feeling Good"that Dr. Hanscom had recommended. Both of these undertakings have been interesting. The book is about personal thought patterns, and how to break out of negative cycles in these areas. The writing exercises go along with that. The concept is that if you "stuff" your negative or "crazy" thoughts instead of acknowledging them, the result is that the effort you put into ignoring them actually gives them more power over you. By simply writing down some negative thoughts each evening, reading through them, acknowledging them, and coming up with a healthier thought pattern to replace the negative one, you will effectively stop their ability to affect you. The last step is always to throw these papers away. (No, you may not dig through my trash.) I am not particularly digging this process, since acknowledging negativity in your life is never pleasant, but I'm committed to seeing it through.

An important part of this appointment, for me, was that we discussed the logistics of scheduling surgery. Apparently, we only have to get on Dr. Hanscom's calendar 6 weeks in advance. This surprised me. We are still concerned about insurance approval, though, so we are going to start looking into more concrete details very soon. My mom and I discussed the fact that we will probably want to schedule the surgery while at my next appointment, since the following appointment, in April, may be less than 6 weeks away from when we want to schedule for. Our aim is to have me in for surgery sometime in the first or second week of June. I am only slightly unsettled with how quickly all of this is approaching. Overall, I still feel very at peace with things.

Prayers for peace and guidance, (for myself and my family) as I go into the next few weeks, and look at setting an official date for the surgery, would be much appreciated :)

Second appointment review.

Yesterday my mom and I went up to Swedish Medical Center for my second appointment with Dr. Hanscom. We started out in x-ray, at 8:30. Left school at 7, and arrived with about a minute to spare- yay traffic!

Check-in went smoothly, and I was soon being whisked away to the ER for a series of x-rays, taken by one of the x-ray techs, Kevin, with assistance from intern Zoe. I wouldn't bother mentioning these people by name, but I really liked them. Kevin had the most legit mutton chops of all time, and he was really nice and respectful. I think I got called "miss" about 12 times within the span of 20 minutes. Zoe was sweet, as well. Apparently she's almost done with her internship, and hopes to get hired at Swedish.

We went to the ER because the other x-ray facilities were filled, (at least, that's the impression I got.) Thanks to some hospital renovations, I got to walk back through all of the hallways and rooms with "STAFF ONLY" signs, and limited access. We took the huge elevator that the gurneys ride on, and on the way back down, we actually rode along with a guy transporting a hospital bed. It was kind of interesting- particularly because I got to see just how ugly all of the rooms in a hospital that aren't typically seen by the public can be. The elevators to and from the lobby, for instance, are all fancy frosted glass and wood paneling. The "STAFF ONLY" elevators in the back were stainless steel and stained white something. Bummerskie.

Anywho, the x-rays were a little more involved then my typical x-ray experience is. They took front standing, and side standing films. Oddly, in this ER they lacked the ability to take a full chest x-ray. So they had to take 2, top and bottom, then "stitch" them together on the computer. I'd just like to note that this bites, cuz I got exposed to twice as much radiation (and considering that I've easily had 50+ x-rays taken of me through the years, I don't need that) and it was a lot more work for Kevin.

They then had me lay on my back for a few more x-rays, these were taken as I bent against my curves, first to the left for the lower/lumbar curve, then to the right for the upper/thoracic curve. I can't bend very far right, but the x-ray techs found it funny that I bend so far left that I was literally hanging in air off the table. They had to swivel the table around to accommodate that. Hahaa. These shots gave Dr. Hanscom the ability to evaluate the flexibility of my curves, and determine the amount of surgical correction that would be possible.

My favorite part of the x-ray experience was laying down on the table, and looking up to see a Winnie the Pooh sticker on the ceiling above my head :)

After x-rays, mom and I headed up to Dr. Hanscom's office on the 5th floor of the James Tower, for my 9:45 appointment with him. We checked in, and were soon informed that he was running about 45 minutes behind schedule. Luckily, we had both brought books. Even better, my afternoon class had been cancelled, so we had nowhere to get to. God arranged that quite nicely!

In the end, we saw Dr. Hanscom a bit after 11. He walked in and informed us that he had set a personal record in falling behind schedule that morning. But he said it with a smile. After our first appointment, I felt like I hadn't been able to get a good read on him. He was only with us for about a half hour, and we went over so much stuff, which stressed me out a lot. It was hard to say whether or not I really liked him at all. Though I know it's most important to have a technically excellelent surgeon, I also really was hoping to find someone that I am comfortable around outside of the operating room. Thankfully, yesterday's appointment cleared those concerns up! Although he was running incredibly late, I felt like he was totally present and focused on my mom and I, and the task at hand.

We discussed the x-rays from that morning, briefly. He said that they were essentially what he was expecting to see- my upper curve is fairly rigid, only correcting to about 30 degrees bending, but the lower curve is very flexible- which is good.

I read about 175 out of 200 pages of his book between our first and second appointment, so he asked me a lot of questions about my understanding of the concepts presented in it. I absolutely love that he takes the approach of asking questions, and letting the patient share where they're at. I once saw a specialist who only liked asking questions so that he could answer them himself, and look more intelligent. (I can't tell you how much I wanted to smack that guy.)

Between now and my next appointment, I am supposed to get into the gym daily, work with my regular physician to do something along the lines of a sleep aid, (I quote Dr. Hanscom, "No sleep is not an option") and start into some writing exercises for him, to help evaluate my mental state. I already went to the gym with my housemate Jess yesterday afternoon, which was a blast! Can't wait to go again today.

However, I forgot to do my evening writing exercises last night. I'll admit I'm not thrilled to start them. Dr. Hanscom suggests that I spend 15 minutes a day writing down every negative thought I can come up with, and then throw them away. The concept is that we expend more energy, and cause ourselves more stress, when we just stuff away our negative thoughts than we would actually acknowledging their existence. So, we'll see how that goes. I may or may not share much about that process, particularly considering that, (and again, I quote,) "The crazier the thoughts, the better." Hahhaaha O.O

We barely discussed surgery yesterday, which was great. Hanscom's attitude about my case, from a surgical perspective, is that it would be prudent for me to have a conservative upper thoracic fusion sometime in the next 2 years, but that there is no immediate reason to rush into surgery. He wants to see me get in great physical shape and have my sleeping patterns and stress levels well under control before going into an operating room.

I am loving this approach, because I have spent so many years with negative associations about surgeons. I always thought of them as these scary people who just want to throw me under the surgical bus, so to speak. (Aka, they want to do surgery on you, but don't spend any time addressing the rest of your life and health.) Dr. Hanscom's holistic approach makes me feel like I am in good hands. Also, he has strongly encouraged me to get active and says that I should be capable of doing anything that doesn't significantly increase my pain. Getting a professional's go-ahead to get out, be active, and stop thinking about myself as fragile is awesome! I have been so afraid to do certain things in the last few years, and this shift in thinking is really exciting.

PS: I am done wearing a back brace forever. That's F.O.R.E.V.E.R. The end. I seriously haven't processed this, and just typing the words is strange. But the more I realize the truth of it, the more I am super-incredibly-ridiculously beyond excited!!!

PPS: More to come later on :)

First appointment review!

Allrighty, my finals are over, woo-hoo! I now have more free time then I can shake a stick at! The perfect time to post an update on how Tuesday's appointment went :)

Interestingly enough, one of the moments from the morning that stuck in my head the most was on the drive up, when we came around a bend in the freeway and Seattle first came into sight. It kind of made my stomach do this weird flip-floppy thing.

I guess it's the same sort of excited and nervous butterflies that people talk about getting around a high school crush. Except for me, I most closely associate that feeling with going into something new with regard to my scoliosis treatments. I've encountered it in the past, on my way to appointments, but it had been a long time since I felt it.

Mostly, it was interesting for me to feel that, and to be able to actively evaluate why I was feeling it. Seems to me that it was mostly the thought of that city being my home for a week, when I finally do have surgery, and how bizarre that was, that was weirding me out. Seeing the whole city from a distance like that, taking it all in, made this whole experience that much more real to me.

Okay. So, the appointment went well. Dr. Hanscom is nice, and wore a really cool rainbow striped tie! I thought it was cool, my dad wasn't such a huge fan. Mostly, we answered questions for the nurse, first, and then for Hanscom. We had the chance to ask some questions, but most of them were premature at this stage.

Dr. Hanscom places a large emphasis on pain management and overall healthy living, outside of surgery, and that definitely showed up in his recommendations for me. He had seen some of my x-rays in advance, and was able to say that yes, he would suggest surgery for me. However, the surgery he was talking about was very minor in comparison to what I was expecting. His goal would not be to minimize my curves to the smallest possible degree, but rather to seek the amount of curve correction that would allow me to be stable, and to live pain free.

Now, overall, that sounds great to me! The only reason I can think of to go with an extremely aggressive approach to surgery would be for cosmetic purposes. Essentially, if I wanted to undergo extra pain, recovery time, and risk, the curves could possibly be reduced to much less than Dr. Hanscom was suggesting, and my rib hump and other visible signs of my scoliosis could be greatly reduced.  BUT I am not doing this surgery to look better, and the added recovery doesn't sound like it would be worth it, even if that were my goal.

We are going back to Swedish for an appointment on January 6th. I will have x-rays done that day, followed by a meeting with Dr. Hanscom to go over the x-rays, and discuss more specific details of his recommendations for my treatment. I have decided to wait until after that appointment to make any decisions on whether or not to seek a second opinion from another surgeon.

There were two anxiety provoking aspects of this appointment, for me. The first was trying to go over my history of treatment (which has spanned roughly ten years, 3 major treatment programs, and multiple doctors) in a very short span of time. For whatever reason, revisiting all of those experiences so quickly got me slightly emotional. The second thing that stressed me a bit was the rest of Dr. Hanscom's treatment protocol.

As a doctor who studies and treats chronic pain, Hanscom is always looking to see what can be done for a patient outside of surgery. For this reason, he wants me to get into a schedule of physical therapy, specific exercise, supplements, etc. starting as soon as possible. This will get my body into optimal shape for surgery, and give me a good head start on recovery from the spinal fusion. What tweaked me out was hearing him say things like, "3 to 5 hours of weight training a week." Let me be clear here, people. I STRONGLY dislike the gym. I just do not have good associations with it, and I know that will have to change.

Essentially, I will have to go from being a person who has pretty well avoided doing anything specific by way of exercise over the past two years, (aside from occasional yoga classes, swimming sessions, and wearing my brace,) to being a gym rat, in just a few weeks time. I do not relish this change in lifestyle, but I know it will be for the best. I also know that I have a number of friends and acquaintances here at school who frequent the gym, who I can and will be asking to be my work-out partners and to help hold me accountable in all this.

I was feeling especially overwhelmed heading into Tuesday evening. The rest of Tuesday, after the appointment, consisted of heading back to school, taking a religion final, doing hw, a nice movie break with my housemate Hailey, then going to my grandparent's to celebrate my brother's birthday with family. A fun day, but a very full day, and I really didn't get much of a chance to process the information and emotions from the morning appointment.

Luckily, Tuesday nights are my campus ministry group's worship night, and that evening was our last gathering before Christmas break. It was awesome to get to gather with good friends, worship the Lord, and do some praying, as well as receive some much needed prayer and support.
While there, I was reading Phillipians, and verses 3:12-14 really stood out to me. Specifically, verse 12, which reads:

^"2 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me."

What caught my eye, but more like my heart, was the phrase, "that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me." This verse is a beautiful reminder for me of what a lot of friends and family have been repeating to me, lately; that I need not worry, because God has big plans for my future, and He will be with me every step of this journey. To see this verse reminded me that YES, the Lord has made me and called me for a purpose. He will pull me through this, because He isn't through with me yet.

In addition, the portion about "pressing on to take hold of" that plan of God, is an inspiration to me as I get ready to make this lifestyle shift. If ever I am tempted to start falling back into my old way of thinking, if I ever I go back to putting caring for myself on the bottom of my to-do list- because it's only something that affects me- I will go back and re-read this verse.

I will read it because it reminds me that each task put before me, no matter how insignificant it may seem, is a way in which the Lord is forming me into who He would have me be, and preparing me for the plan He has for my life. It reminds me that I am called by God to take care of this body that He has given me, that it is a temple for Him. More important than anything, it reminds me that it is not a selfish thing, or a waste of time to care for myself.

The best I can do is to remember that every hour I spend in the gym, or at P.T., is a way in which I can glorify my Creator, by respecting that He has a calling for me, and preparing myself today for the time in which that calling is made clear to me.

With these truths in mind, I feel peaceful moving forward. Aside from just waiting for the January appointment, Dr. Hanscom has assigned me homework. He is sending me a book about chronic pain management to read. He wrote this book, so it will be great to read it, and really understand where he is coming from when I go back in for my next appointment.

I guess that's all for now! Alas, I always end up so wordy. But you know, if it wasn't wordy, it just wouldn't be me :)

First appointment soon...

Just wanted to put the word out that I will be having my first appointment with a surgeon this coming Tuesday, the 14th.

After much research, I determined that the Swedish Orthopedic Institute in Seattle would be the best place to start looking for surgeons. They have 3 spinal specialists that we looked into. After reading through their websites, watching some interview videos of them, and getting a recommendation from a family friend for one specific doctor, I determined that Dr. David Hanscom would be the first surgeon I would like to meet with.

A friend of my grandparent's recently had a procedure done by Dr. Hanscom, and spoke quite highly of his friendly manner, professionalism, and commitment to take the time to really get to know his patients, while providing very clear information. He sounds like a good communicator, which is important to me! Obviously, my foremost concern is finding a surgeon who knows what he's doing in the operating room... but if I'm not comfortable interacting with someone outside of the O.R. then I don't want that person as my doctor.

There are links to Dr. Hanscom's info below. The first is a link to Swedish Medical Center's biography for him, and the second is to a website about his pain management program. Pain management is obviously an area that he is very passionate about and one in which he has invested a great deal of work. It's interesting to see his compassion for his patients show through his writing on that site.

http://www.swedish.org/Physicians/David-Hanscom

AND

http://www.doccproject.com

So far as Tuesday's appointment goes, I don't really know what to expect. I had to fill out a ridiculous amount of paperwork in preparation for it. Most likely, we will be going over my past history, and having some x-rays taken which he will then be able to evaluate before giving us an official opinion.

Essentially, I don't expect to have him tell me exactly what approach he would take in surgery, how many vertebrae would be fused etc. at Tuesday's appointment. I think there will be a follow-up appointment scheduled for all of that.

My mom and I will be compiling my past scoliosis treatment records this weekend, and I'm really curious to see it all come together. Also, we will be hand carrying a copy of my latest x-rays to the appointment.

My orthotist emailed a copy of these to me, as you can see below. My curves were approximately 68 degrees thoracic (upper back) and 64 degrees lumbar (lower back) when these were taken. What I find most interesting is how you can clearly see my ribs smashed together on my front left side (right side of the image.) Sometimes, if I'm really lucky, I can feel them rub against each other!

This shot was taken in brace - you can kind of see the bands and straps.

This shot was taken out of brace.

While I'm at it, I'll share one of my favorite self-depricating jokes from middle school, made complete with visual aids right above:
"I always like to say that my weird back is just God's way of making up for the other curves that He didn't give me."
HAHAHAAHAhhaaaaa. That's a knee-slapper! It would have been genuinely funny, too, if it weren't so true :P But the rest of me caught up a bit, so all's well that ends well :)

Aside from gathering my records, my mom and I will be working on a list of questions to bring with us, just so we can keep track of things and be sure that we've covered all our bases.

Right now, I'm feeling pretty good about the appointment. Honestly, I haven't had time to think about it, too much. Definitely not enough time to be anxious. At least, not until I go to bed at night.

Being in dead week, heading into finals week, keeps me busy enough during the daytime that I just can't dwell on much outside of school. However, I'm sure this weekend will provide enough downtime to find me stressing out a bit. Having this appointment fall in finals week wouldn't have been my first choice, I can say that much.

At the moment, I'm really looking forward to the appointment. Yes, all of this is nerve wracking, but it feels really great to be getting the process started. Knowing that I will soon have someone who is an expert sitting in front of me, ready to answer some of the questions that I have been carrying around for anywhere from a few weeks, to many years, is exciting!

All of your prayers are so appreciated, and if I can please ask for you to pray specifically for peace of mind for my parents, and for me to be able to focus on finals, this week - that would be extra amazing!

I'll post again before the week is out :)